Devil’s Advocates get a bad rap. Just look at the name. Geez. Why can’t they be Archangel’s Advocates? Or the Let’s-Think-This-Through-The Second-And-Third-Order-Affects Advocates. Okay, I guess that one is a bit long. I’m not a labels guy, but I have been accused of being a Devil’s Advocate. I guess it depends how you define it. If someone just disagrees for the sake of disagreeing, in New Hampshire we call that person a jerk. But if you disagree or offer a different perspective because you think the alternatives have not been given due consideration and/or there are noteworthy flaws on the current path, well, I will call that a Devil’s Advocate (because Archangel’s Advocate has not caught on yet). And I am proud to be one. And I advocate for others who have the courage to do the same.
And I do think it takes courage. Our society is falling prey to too much group think. You sit at a conference table with ten people and seven or eight are quickly coming to an agreement. Typically, the last two or three fall right in line. It’s easier. I was one of those ten for quite a while and it got a bit lonely being a voice of dissent. I didn’t do it often but did when I felt it mattered. But over the years I can safely say that I was the Archangel’s Advocate (wow, it’s already catching on) more than the rest of them put together. I sometimes wonder if anyone has filled that role since my departure.
I’m not writing today to dissect those who don’t stand up in this role. The reasons are simple. Either they lack the experience to see the problems, gaps, and flawed logic on the particular matter at hand and/or they fear reprisal. That’s it really. Oh, and people who claim they are just being diplomatic and collaborative, I don’t buy it. You can be an Archangel’s Advocate and still be diplomatic and collaborative. We are all unique creatures with different experiences, cultures, values, ideas… If you have never been in a room where you are the only one who sees a situation a certain way, that is just not natural.
Anyway, the reason why I am writing this today is to push the envelope. I have been holding off on a few opinions not because I have not processed thoughts but honestly because I have been afraid to address them. I admit to my fears. My bucket list urges me to face them. With that, here are a few topics where I feel like an Archangel’s Advocate.
Humor is dying and we should save it. Comedians used to be popular and appreciated. But their job keeps getting harder. Society, or masses within society, have decided that just about everything is inappropriate to joke about. Years ago, Richard Pryor joked, “I had to stop drinking though ‘cause I got tired of waking up in my car, driving 90.” I’m not sure that joke would work today. Drinking and driving is bad. People die from drinking and driving. That was true during his time as well, but we somehow forgot a truism of humor. Humor can bring people together and diffuse tension on difficult topics. Humor makes us confront our own perceptions. Race, politics, sex – those are hot button issues. But comedians helped us not take everything so seriously all of the time. I advocate for comedians and for humor. Our world has enough anger. Let’s protect laughter.
We are too thin skinned. We get offended at everything. The other day I read a social media post by a self-described Millennial Influencer (her label, not mine). She complained that Boomers need to stop talking to other people’s children in public. I didn’t take any personal offense. I am on the cusp of Boomer and Generation X, and I don’t talk much to strangers. Not my jam. But my first thought was, oh, here’s another thing we can’t do or say to add to the list for fear of not offending someone. My second thought was, did I just hear that right? Did she demonstrate that she was offended by a certain behavior while insulting an entire generation of others that she stereotyped? Because that’s where the rub comes in. If you wanted to be offended by the clothes I wear, the car I drive, and the job I do, well then, that opens the door for me to be offended by your choices. I advocate for those who do not sweat the small stuff and who choose to give the benefit of the doubt where possible.
Karens aren’t always Karens. First of all, my apologies to all the wonderful women actually named Karen. The label is just not fair. Maybe we should call those culprits Devils (see what I did there?) and then we can all advocate against them. But it gets more complicated than the name. Have you noticed this trend (and you probably have to watch a bunch of Karen videos and stories to understand this) where more and more lately it is harder to decide which person in the conflict is the true Karen? At the beginning it was easy. The Karens were racists, liars, troublemakers, and often nonsensical. Today, if someone confronts someone who breaks a rule, cuts in line, or gives bad service, they are labeled Karens. Wasn’t it yesterday when breaking rules, cutting in lines, and giving bad service was the bad thing? I advocate for people who challenge bad behavior and not try to change the narrative through the use of a vague broken stereotype label. And let’s give the beautiful woman whose parents named them Karen their names back.
This isn’t about humor, sensitivity, or name-calling. Those were just a few of my examples of speaking up, even if you are the only one who feels the way you do. Let all of our voices be heard. Or maybe I’m wrong and I need to start a twelve-step program.
Hi. My name is Dan. I’m an Archangel’s Advocate.
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Stoneking Strategic Communications (SSC) 